Devotions for Disciples

Have you ever been tired? I mean bone-weary tired. So tired that you start thinking that it’s time to hang it up and let the younger guys do it. That was me almost four weeks ago – before my sabbatical. I would love to be able to tell you that I am completely refreshed and renewed and rejuvenated after my time off, but I won’t lie to you. I’m still tired, but it’s a good kind of tired. 

Lots of people have asked me how my “vacation” has been, and I’ve tried to explain that a sabbatical is not a vacation. The  truth is that I’ve put in lots of hours doing ministry – just a different kind of ministry. Not having all of the official duties as a pastor relieved some of the pressure to allow me to do some of the things I’ve wanted to do for a long time, and it has been a tremendous blessing. But it’s also given me lots of time to think about things, and that’s not always good.

I’m a brooder. I often get an idea and start going down that path and it seems like I can’t get it off of my mind. Case in point: in recent months I started thinking about the impact I was having in several of my roles in Dadeville. Chaplain of the football team, police department, and fire department. I serve on the State Task Force of Alabama Baptist Disaster Relief as well as on the Executive Committee of our Alabama Baptist State Board of Missions. All positions that I have enjoyed immensely, but I started questioning whether or not I was being effective in any of it. Can anybody say, “Pity party?” B.S. – before sabbatical – I had even considered letting go and letting the younger guys do it. Then God did what He always does. He showed me that He wasn’t quite finished with me yet, and He did it by way of, guess what? More opportunities to minister to hurting people. By sending a young man in a grocery store who came up to me and said, “You’re Pastor Hayes, aren’t you?” When I responded in the affirmative, he offered his hand and gave me a hug. By sending another young man at the ball field who came up behind me, grabbed my shoulder, shook my hand, hugged me, and said, “I’m glad you’re back. We missed you.” And another one who invited me to sit in the dugout at the baseball game tomorrow night. Don’t worry, Coach, I won’t intrude.

It’s the little things that God uses to remind you that He has always had a plan and a purpose, and when He gets ready for that to change, He isn’t going to do it through a pity-party. Am I tired as I type this? You bet. Getting up at 4:20 in the morning isn’t my cup of tea. Spending hours in front of a keyboard doing the writing He has called me to do is hard work – don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Staying away from my church family that I love with all of my heart for a month – that’s tough. But sabbatical is almost over. A week from today, God willing, I will be back in the office in my regular routine. I will be refreshed, renewed, and rejuvenated because God has promised that those who actively wait on Him will mount up on eagles’ wings, will run and not be weary, and will walk and not be faint. I’m with you, Father, but can I skip the running part? I AM too old for that!